I really love this, it brought me to tears. And the sidewalk thing got me thinking - I live in Canada, and whenever there's a snowstorm (there have been so many this year!) I notice that if only one person fails to shovel their sidewalk, then the sidewalk as a whole becomes more or less useless (often there are huge snowbanks created by street plows so it's not easy to jump these and use the road when you come to an unshoveled segment of the sidewalk). But some of the sidewalks aren't shoveled for reasons we'll never know - eldery people, someone who might have been sick or depressed that day, someone whose life is so busy they just couldn't get to it, etc. And sometimes what you see is people shovelling their own sidewalk AND that of their neighbour. While keeping our own segment clear is a lovely thing, imagine if we all gave the benefit of the doubt to those who can't manage their own, and then if we had the bandwidth we just did it for them.
Hi. Neighbor! Thank you so much for stopping by to comment on this piece. It is so close to my heart. I'm touched that it had an emotional impact on you. Your story about sidewalks in Canada sparked a long forgotten memory for me! One of my closest friends went to McGill University in Montreal back in the late '90s/early '00s. Living in Upstate New York, I took any opportunity I could to make the three hour trek up and visit him there because Montreal is just the best, especially when you are young and adventurous. This would often be during winter when I was on break from my own university, and of course the snow storms in Montreal are legendary. One time we were out walking around the city near campus, and it was a particularly sloped area. Well, there was just enough ice on the sidewalk that I watched one person after another slip, land on their backsides, and literally slide down the street. I don't know whose job it was to keep that sidewalk clear, but they definitely failed. I have to admit it was like a comedy sketch. Thankfully nobody I saw got hurt (other than their pride). However, if smartphones were a thing back then it for sure would have gone viral on social media.
The first part of your story recalls me when, even in Italy, people kept their side of the street, in front of their house or the store where they worked, clean of snow or dust. Then, people stopped doing this by saying that the municipality (the civil authority that administers Italian villages and towns; each place elects its own mayor) had to do it. This deferring to others, within a few decades, became a sign of the changing of Italian society, which had become distrustful of the idea of community, especially in the north and the cities.
The second part reminded me that, fortunately, here and there, we have the opportunity to keep clean the other side of the street simply by chatting with a stranger or starting to read a newsletter that opens our minds. Especially those who remind us all that WE are the other side of the street to whoever is in front of us. Thank you Tim
So well said, Monica. We are the other side of the street to others, and anything we can do to extend a hand in friendship and support in our small sphere of influence is bringing good into the world.
This had me choked up. I restacked this, mentioning how I keep hearing this message in various ways on various platforms. Your version turned up the volume for me. We can only control what's in front of us, but if we each do our part to *be* good and *do* good in our communities, what a wonderful world this could be.
If you keep hearing it, I believe the Universe is sending you (and probably all of us that need it right now) a message. I know I wrote this because I needed to hear it from myself! Now I just have to work hard to follow my own advice - a bigger challenge than I often like to admit. Good luck to you on your own journey, and thank you so much for stopping by to comment and for amplifying my words. It is much appreciated.
What a beautiful reminder to look up. We tend to get so caught up in our own minds, matters, and scurrying to "get things done" that we forget to look up and take it all in. I love that he found you and you have stayed in touch! I have two whom I'd like to reconnect with (actually, make that 3). Now, I may have to make 3 posts this year about them and see where it leads...
p.s. - I'd love to have you as a guest on my podcast. Let me know if you're interested. It's called Story & Strength (new in 2025) and is about discussing life's narratives that define and shape us.
It's always startling to me when my writing has an impact on the people who read it, so thank you for taking the time to comment and remind me. My story about meeting Firas is one I revisit often in my own mind, especially when I start to feel sad about humanity. It's a huge part of the reason that I love traveling so much. Even though we have stayed somewhat connected, I am sure he has no idea how much him saying hello on that day nearly ten years ago has impacted me. That is probably true of all of us, in some way. There are people out there who remember us, and we likely have no idea why.
I would be honored to participate in your podcast, Shonda! I have declared 2025 my year of conversations, so absolutely. Let me know.
I have enjoyed your posts. The last two especially. I recently read an article by James Martin about the “ministry” of presence, simply being present for each other, especially when we disagree.
Heading to Spain soon to continue my pilgrimage on the Camino. I always have similar encounters with people as I walk.
Thanks Mary- I'm going to check out that article ASAP. Have fun on the Camino. I'm sure you have some interesting stories from your various times on that famous path!
Wow Tum. This spoke to me so much. My word for 2025 is connection. It's so important and makes life worth living. I love the sidewalk metaphor. I just had a personal tragedy that has made life feel overwhelming, but tending to my sidewalk feels doable. Thank you for that.
Thanks for stopping by and taking the time to comment, Kaila. It means a lot to me to know my writing resonates with readers. I'm sorry to hear about your struggles right now. I wrote about focusing on the small things we can actually make a difference with because we have all been there at some point, when the world just feels like it's asking far too much of us. I am certainly there right now, and I can only imagine how a personal tragedy would amplify that. I hope that you are able to move through your current challenges and see a light on the other side sooner rather than later. Take care.
This resonates so strongly with me and reminded me of a photo I have kept. I can’t paste it here but it says “Some stranger somewhere remembers you because you were kind to them”. And as you point out some of those strangers become a friend.
Thank you so much for being here, Jan. I know that phrase well, and it's so true. We really have no idea how we have impacted many people over our years on Earth. Be well!
I really love this, it brought me to tears. And the sidewalk thing got me thinking - I live in Canada, and whenever there's a snowstorm (there have been so many this year!) I notice that if only one person fails to shovel their sidewalk, then the sidewalk as a whole becomes more or less useless (often there are huge snowbanks created by street plows so it's not easy to jump these and use the road when you come to an unshoveled segment of the sidewalk). But some of the sidewalks aren't shoveled for reasons we'll never know - eldery people, someone who might have been sick or depressed that day, someone whose life is so busy they just couldn't get to it, etc. And sometimes what you see is people shovelling their own sidewalk AND that of their neighbour. While keeping our own segment clear is a lovely thing, imagine if we all gave the benefit of the doubt to those who can't manage their own, and then if we had the bandwidth we just did it for them.
Hi. Neighbor! Thank you so much for stopping by to comment on this piece. It is so close to my heart. I'm touched that it had an emotional impact on you. Your story about sidewalks in Canada sparked a long forgotten memory for me! One of my closest friends went to McGill University in Montreal back in the late '90s/early '00s. Living in Upstate New York, I took any opportunity I could to make the three hour trek up and visit him there because Montreal is just the best, especially when you are young and adventurous. This would often be during winter when I was on break from my own university, and of course the snow storms in Montreal are legendary. One time we were out walking around the city near campus, and it was a particularly sloped area. Well, there was just enough ice on the sidewalk that I watched one person after another slip, land on their backsides, and literally slide down the street. I don't know whose job it was to keep that sidewalk clear, but they definitely failed. I have to admit it was like a comedy sketch. Thankfully nobody I saw got hurt (other than their pride). However, if smartphones were a thing back then it for sure would have gone viral on social media.
Take care up there in Canada! #Elbowsup
Connections are everything. They can not only improve your life, they can save you in difficult moment.
So true, Liza! We are nothing without other people.
The first part of your story recalls me when, even in Italy, people kept their side of the street, in front of their house or the store where they worked, clean of snow or dust. Then, people stopped doing this by saying that the municipality (the civil authority that administers Italian villages and towns; each place elects its own mayor) had to do it. This deferring to others, within a few decades, became a sign of the changing of Italian society, which had become distrustful of the idea of community, especially in the north and the cities.
The second part reminded me that, fortunately, here and there, we have the opportunity to keep clean the other side of the street simply by chatting with a stranger or starting to read a newsletter that opens our minds. Especially those who remind us all that WE are the other side of the street to whoever is in front of us. Thank you Tim
So well said, Monica. We are the other side of the street to others, and anything we can do to extend a hand in friendship and support in our small sphere of influence is bringing good into the world.
This had me choked up. I restacked this, mentioning how I keep hearing this message in various ways on various platforms. Your version turned up the volume for me. We can only control what's in front of us, but if we each do our part to *be* good and *do* good in our communities, what a wonderful world this could be.
If you keep hearing it, I believe the Universe is sending you (and probably all of us that need it right now) a message. I know I wrote this because I needed to hear it from myself! Now I just have to work hard to follow my own advice - a bigger challenge than I often like to admit. Good luck to you on your own journey, and thank you so much for stopping by to comment and for amplifying my words. It is much appreciated.
What a beautiful reminder to look up. We tend to get so caught up in our own minds, matters, and scurrying to "get things done" that we forget to look up and take it all in. I love that he found you and you have stayed in touch! I have two whom I'd like to reconnect with (actually, make that 3). Now, I may have to make 3 posts this year about them and see where it leads...
p.s. - I'd love to have you as a guest on my podcast. Let me know if you're interested. It's called Story & Strength (new in 2025) and is about discussing life's narratives that define and shape us.
It's always startling to me when my writing has an impact on the people who read it, so thank you for taking the time to comment and remind me. My story about meeting Firas is one I revisit often in my own mind, especially when I start to feel sad about humanity. It's a huge part of the reason that I love traveling so much. Even though we have stayed somewhat connected, I am sure he has no idea how much him saying hello on that day nearly ten years ago has impacted me. That is probably true of all of us, in some way. There are people out there who remember us, and we likely have no idea why.
I would be honored to participate in your podcast, Shonda! I have declared 2025 my year of conversations, so absolutely. Let me know.
Hey Tim,
I have enjoyed your posts. The last two especially. I recently read an article by James Martin about the “ministry” of presence, simply being present for each other, especially when we disagree.
Heading to Spain soon to continue my pilgrimage on the Camino. I always have similar encounters with people as I walk.
Keep writing…. :-). Mary
Thanks Mary- I'm going to check out that article ASAP. Have fun on the Camino. I'm sure you have some interesting stories from your various times on that famous path!
Wow Tum. This spoke to me so much. My word for 2025 is connection. It's so important and makes life worth living. I love the sidewalk metaphor. I just had a personal tragedy that has made life feel overwhelming, but tending to my sidewalk feels doable. Thank you for that.
Thanks for stopping by and taking the time to comment, Kaila. It means a lot to me to know my writing resonates with readers. I'm sorry to hear about your struggles right now. I wrote about focusing on the small things we can actually make a difference with because we have all been there at some point, when the world just feels like it's asking far too much of us. I am certainly there right now, and I can only imagine how a personal tragedy would amplify that. I hope that you are able to move through your current challenges and see a light on the other side sooner rather than later. Take care.
Thank you, Tim. In getting there, and reading posts like this helps. Keep up the good work 🙏
*Tim!
This resonates so strongly with me and reminded me of a photo I have kept. I can’t paste it here but it says “Some stranger somewhere remembers you because you were kind to them”. And as you point out some of those strangers become a friend.
Thank you so much for being here, Jan. I know that phrase well, and it's so true. We really have no idea how we have impacted many people over our years on Earth. Be well!